Adapting at Work Isn't the Problem. Disappearing Is.

Adapting at work isn't the problem. Disappearing is.

For years in corporate America, I adapted. I softened my voice in some rooms. I hid how my brain actually works. I became whoever the meeting needed me to be.

Some of that is just being a good colleague. We all flex. But there's a line, and I didn't notice when I crossed it. Adapting turned into editing myself so often that I stopped trusting the version underneath.

If you've ever left work feeling like you spent the whole day performing a person, you're not imagining it. That exhaustion is real, and it isn't a resilience problem.

Here's what I believe now: no one can bring their whole self to work if the only safe version is the one that carries the most and asks for the least. That's true for leaders, and it's true for every one of us who decides what our teammates feel safe showing.

Grateful to Kristin Strunk for her post on adapting your personality at work — it got me thinking about this.

Where's your line between adapting and disappearing?

Link in the first comment.