Past Performance Does Not Erase Present Needs

“You used to be able to do this. Why can’t you now?”

For those of us who are neurodivergent, that question can carry an accusation: If you did it before, you must not be trying now.

But what did “being able to” actually look like?

1️⃣ You saw the result. You may not have seen the cost.

The preparation. The masking. The exhaustion.

The evening spent recovering so we could do it again tomorrow.

2️⃣ Doing something once doesn’t mean we can sustain it.

Getting through a demanding day and repeating it indefinitely are different things.

3️⃣ The task may be the same. The conditions may have changed.

More noise. Less sleep. Different instructions. More demands. Less support.

Those things matter.

4️⃣ We may finally be telling you what we used to hide.

An honest “I’m struggling” can look like a change in ability when it’s a change in what we’re willing to disclose.

5️⃣ Past performance doesn’t erase present needs.

We shouldn’t have to reach a breaking point before our need for support is taken seriously.

Sometimes we’re asking ourselves the same question: “Why can’t I do this now?”

We may be frustrated, grieving, or still trying to understand what changed.

A better place to begin:

👉 “What’s different, and what would help?”

Let our history be information, not a weapon used against us.

This is part of the conversation in Grounded in How I’m Wired, Book V of Musings of a Recovering Executive.

Available on Amazon.

#neurodivergence #neurodivergentvoices #neuroinclusiveleadership #groundedinhowimwired