To My Neurodivergent Friends

To my neurodivergent friends:

I want to say something to you that I am still learning to say to myself.

❤️‍🩹I know how hard you try.

❤️‍🩹I know what it's like to be incredibly capable in one moment and completely overwhelmed by something seemingly simple in the next.

To have your brain moving at 100 miles an hour and still not be able to start the thing.

To need structure and resist structure.

To thrive in chaos and be completely undone by the wrong kind of chaos.

To know exactly what you want to say and suddenly have absolutely no words.

To replay the conversation afterward and think of every response you couldn't find in the moment.

I know what it's like to wonder:

Why can I do THAT, but I can't do THIS?

And I know how easy it is to turn that question into judgment.

❤️‍🩹The mask is real.

❤️‍🩹The difficulties are real.

❤️‍🩹The exhaustion is real.

And so is the work of figuring out where you are comfortable enough to put the mask down.

Not everywhere will be that place.

Not everyone will be that person.

And maybe part of understanding our wiring is learning that we don't have to force ourselves to be equally comfortable everywhere.

We get to learn ourselves.

What helps us focus.

What overwhelms us.

What makes us shut down.

What helps us come back.

How we learn.

How we communicate.

What we need when our brains simply say, Nope. Not today.

And maybe most importantly, we get to stop measuring how difficult something should be by how easy it appears to be for someone else.

I'm still learning this.

I'm still figuring out which parts of me are actually me and which parts were built over decades of trying to function the way I thought I was supposed to.

But here's something I know now:

Understanding why something is hard doesn't make you weak.

It gives you information.

And information gives you choices.

So, to my fellow differently wired humans:

➡️Keep learning yourself.

➡️Keep finding the places where your shoulders come down.

➡️Keep finding the people around whom you don't have to translate every part of yourself.

➡️Keep asking for what you need, even when figuring out what you need is part of the difficulty.

And on the days when something that looks ridiculously easy feels ridiculously hard?

❤️‍🩹Give yourself a little room.

Sometimes you're trying far harder than anyone realizes.

I see you, friends.

I'm one of you.

And I'm really glad we're finally talking about it.

Lynn

You can find the book available on Amazon, I hope it gives you insight, ideas, and peace 🙏